Can I use remote shutter release and focus recompose?

Need some help please! Later today my family and I are going out to take some family pics. It's just going to be us so we will be using a tripod and remote shutter release. Is there a way to focus recompose while using a remote shutter release? We're all pretty tall and so we want to focus towards the top of the photos. If we us the center focus or the one right above it then our stomachs will be in focus. Nikon d5000, Thanks

A few things to consider:
1. If you're photographing a group in a single row, then pose them and focus on their eyes and use an aperture of f/5.6 or f/8. If you've got two-three rows, the focus in between and use at least f/8. Double check the image on LCD screen to ensure you've got the focus, depth of field, and the exposure correct.
2. Then get into the shot and use your remote to trigger the camera, or just use the self timer and run into position. You won't have to worry about re-focusing because you would have already pre-focused and set the camera to manual focus to ensure that the focus doesn't shift each time you press shutter button or the button on your remote. Your camera may have a menu setting that prevents the use of a remote from focusing the lens.
3. Try using a flash in aperture priority which will add a catch light in your subject's eyes and also reduce heavy shadows.
4. Try shooting early in the morning or later on in the evening. Avoid mid-day light as it's the least attractive and most harsh light of the day. However if you have to shoot in the middle of the day (between 11am and 3 pm) then put your subject in shadow and use a fill flash.
5. Try using a stronger focal length and moving the camera back a bit as opposed to getting the camera in close and using a wide angle lens. This will reduce distortion and help blur out the background. The strong your lens, the more blur you'll get.

You should do a few test shots prior the big day to make sure you know how to set the camera up.

Yes, you can. This is covered on page 67 of your manual. Put it into Remote mode, focus the camera on the heads by pressing down half way, then press the rest of the way. It won't take a pic. Then join the group, smile (I always forget to do that), and press the remote.